Dating in The Philippines

How to Find a Filipina Wife – A Step by Step Guide

I remember I was single and searching and just not sure how to find a good Filipina wife. We all know there are tons of choices but not a lot of good options out there. That’s why I’ve written this step by step guide to help you find the beautiful Filipina wife you’re looking for. We all know you can just go to whatever dating site and get inundated with messages from desperate girls who will marry anyone but I suspect that’s not what you’re looking for if you’re reading this article.

How to Find a Filipina Wife – A Step-by-Step Guide

Step 1. Know what you’re looking for

Step 2. Date with the intention to marry

Step 3: Realize that looks matter to you AND her

Step 4: Look for consistency in her beliefs 

 Step 5: Be a man of honor yourself

Step 6: Look in the right places

Most of us have the drive to be coupled and married. We just know deep down that even though putting a ring on her finger can be a scary daunting endeavor that it’s the right thing to do. Scientific data bear this out. Numerous studies show that married men live longer, make more money, and are overall happier than their single counterparts.

Step 1: Have an Idea of What You’re Looking For

One of the biggest perks to dating in The Philippines as a foreigner is that you’ll have a plethora of options. If you are serious about marriage, though, it’s important to at least have an idea of what you’re looking for. One of the most important aspects of building a strong foundation with someone is that they share your values.  If you’re a devout Christian and she’s a holiday Christian that will most likely lead up to irreconcilable differences. Likewise, if you’re a saver and she’s a spender anticipate a relationship full of frustration and deep conflict.

That being said I’m not a fan of making a mental laundry list of qualities that a girl must have. Everyone is different and there are so many variables when choosing a life partner that having a rigid laundry list of what your wife should be may keep you from your blessing.  That’s why its best just to have a general idea of what you’re looking for but nothing more than that.

Related: What to Expect When Dating a Filipina

Step 2: Date With The Intention to Marry

Sometimes we guys get overwhelmed by the sheer number of gorgeous women throwing themselves at us. It can cause us to become cocky and play the field. We entertain girls that we know full well we’d never marry. You must resist this urge if you hope to find a serious woman to be your wife. Why? For one thing, you’ll spend a lot of money taking these girls out. Also, bar girls and girls that go around dating sites have a lot of experience extracting money from foreign guys. Before you know it you’ll be making money transfers to that girl who showed you her boobs just 3 weeks ago.

However, if you date with the intention to marry you’ll instinctively filter out the scantily clad hooker pretending to be a student.  It will help you maintain a level head to make the right choice.

Step 3: Looks Matter to You and Her

Which leads me to my next point. Some people teach we shouldn’t look at outward appearance when selecting a mate. That’s nonsense. If looks didn’t mattter then why are the makeup and fitness industries both billion-dollar enterprises? That being said the women that are most likely to draw our eye are usually the ones we shouldn’t be dating.  In my opinion, looks absolutely do matter. There must be physical attraction. Plus a woman that can’t control her eating probably lacks discipline in other important areas as well.

A good rule of thumb for serious men to follow is if you can see yourself being intimate with her with the lights on then she’s pretty enough. A good ratio is 30% looks 70% personality. Not the other way around like many younger men like to think. 

I would be remiss in my duty if I didn’t point out that we too must work to make ourselves physically appealing to a female as well. Remember, women have eyes too. I’m not saying you need to have abs to get a good girl but if one is overweight working to lose some of it will help you tremendously in your search for a suitable spouse. If you want to lose weight without exercise here is a video I made on that.

Step 4: Look for Consistency in Her Beliefs

We all know many of these women will say whatever they think you want to hear to get you to fall in love with them. The best way to know if your Filipina girlfriend is honest is to look for consistency in her beliefs and values. If she tells you that she loves playing the guitar but you never hear her speak about practicing and learning new songs then she’s probably not telling the truth. If she claims her faith is important to her but you never hear her talking about going to church or reading the Bible that’s inconsistent.  Here’s a video I made on how to tell if your Filipina is honest

Step 5: We Must be Men of Honor Ourselves

Men of honor and integrity must behave in a manner that bequeaths those values. If you truly want to be a man of honor and integrity there are the obvious things I’m sure you already know: don’t push her to sex before she’s ready with her body, respect her, and honor her, etc. While those are correct. the role of the man in the relationship is to lead with honor and integrity. It’s your job to make sure the relationship stays on track towards a loving marriage or end it.

Let’s say, for example, you’re dating a nice young lady. She’s educated and has good morals but you’re just not feeling it with her. Even after trying and trying the feelings just aren’t there and you’re seeing her getting attached to you more and more. It’s your job as a man to put the breaks on. Yes, it will hurt her temporarily but we both know it’ll hurt her a lot more if she finds out that you just settled for her. If you’re not feeling it with her despite the fact that she looks good on paper that means the universe is trying to tell you she’s simply not the right woman for you.

Good women who aren’t desperate want a man that shows strength, not just physical strength but the strength to stay in the right path despite all of the temptations and desires that will be thrown at you two.

Step 6: Play The Long Game

Just like back home, it’s best to be friends first. You can do it like some guys who go online meet this girl chat with her a few weeks and then tie the knot and that can work I’ve found the best way is to be friends. Know her well. I’ve met girls who seemed great. I even bought a ring for one only, only to find out she was making fun of me with her friends. Had I not taken my time I would’ve made a huge mistake. They will try to push you into a relationship quickly because they want you to give them a better life. So that’s why you must be firm that right now you’re just looking for friends.

Step 7: We Must Look in The Right Places

In order to choose a wife the right way then we must look in the right places. If we meet a girl at a bar she’s obviously less likely to have the values that we are searching for. For most guys looking for a Filipina wife the internet will be the medium of choice, but, some sites are better than others. My personal favorite is Christian Filipina (don’t worry you don’t need to be Christian). They do a lot of work to screen the girls and they even offer human matchmaking services to really help you find the right girl. Number two is Filipino Cupid. They’re the world’s largest Filipina dating site but they don’t offer the personalized service that Christian Filipina does.  Foreign Girlfriend is another site, what’s cool about them is they offer a pay-per-use model so you only pay for what you use, like sending messages, instead of a monthly subscription.

Read More Articles on Filipina Dating 

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3 months ago

Hi Expat in Manila from Ginger of Christian Filipina !