What should you do if your Filipina gf keeps asking you for money? RUN! Period. Never mind all the excuses, no matter how clever they are. Just remember this: how is it that she survived 25+ years without you but now all of the sudden the sky will fall if you don’t send her money?
Good girls don’t ask for money, period.
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If You Do Send Her Money Be Honest With Yourself
You’ve all heard the lines before:
“My Lola is sick in the hospital… even though she’s sitting in the sala watching TV.”
“A typhoon destroyed my neighborhood, but magically the Western Union building is okay.”
“I have three kids by three different men, but I’m a good Christian woman, I swear.”
These stories are as old as the internet, yet somehow, people still fall for them. Time and time again, folks in expat communities, especially in places like the Philippines, echo the same advice: good girls don’t ask for money. Period.
It’s not a cultural misunderstanding. It’s not a cute difference in relationship dynamics. It’s a red flag. But despite this repeated wisdom, the scams continue, and hearts (and wallets) keep getting broken.
Local Filipinos often advise foreign men to seek out partners from higher social or educational backgrounds. The thinking is simple: women who are stable and educated typically don’t rely on sweet-talking strangers on the internet to pay their bills. And yet, the stories roll in. So why do men keep falling for it?
As a business owner, I can tell you straight: marketing matters. It’s easier for someone to part with money if they feel like they’re stepping in to save the day rather than just paying a subscription fee to keep a girlfriend.
Frame it as a medical emergency, a natural disaster, or a family crisis, and the wallet opens a little faster. The reality is, many of these requests are nothing more than emotional manipulation with a good sales pitch.
But here’s the twist that people don’t often want to admit: most of these men know what’s going on. At least on some level, they’re aware that something isn’t adding up. And yet, they go along with it. Why? Because in many cases, everyone’s getting something they want.
Locals from poorer communities have learned that being overly accommodating, affectionate, and loyal-looking can yield big returns. It’s not even always malicious. In fact, it’s a form of survival. If someone is willing to support them in exchange for affection and attention, many will see it as a fair trade.
On the flip side, many expats don’t mind the exchange. In fact, they might prefer it. I’ve met guys who, back home, struggled to find dates, felt invisible, or were disrespected in relationships. Now, in the Philippines, they’re dating someone they find physically attractive, who treats them well, and who makes them feel important. Often, the girlfriend’s family treats them like royalty. They get respect, attention, and companionship. And if sending some cash helps maintain that lifestyle, many are more than happy to do it.
This is why calling these men “naïve” or “desperate” isn’t always fair. They’re not being tricked in every case. Sometimes, they’re entering into these arrangements with eyes wide open. It’s transactional, yes. But so are a lot of relationships, even in the West.
That leads us to a bigger point: the idea of marrying for love is actually a relatively modern invention. Historically, marriages were strategic. They were used to build political alliances, strengthen business relationships, consolidate wealth, or elevate social status. Love was often a bonus, not a requirement. Families arranged unions based on practical benefits, and emotions were secondary.
Even today, many cultures view marriage more as a partnership than a fairy tale. And when we look at modern Western marriages, which are supposedly built on love, we see a divorce rate hovering around 50%. So really, who are we to judge when two consenting adults strike a deal that works for both of them?
Of course, not all arrangements are healthy. If the relationship becomes too one-sided—where one partner is constantly giving, and the other is only taking—then it’s worth reevaluating. No one deserves to be manipulated or financially drained under the guise of love. But not every relationship that includes financial support is automatically a scam either. Some people genuinely care for each other and simply have different resources.
So what’s the takeaway?
Stay informed. Be honest with yourself about what you’re getting into. Don’t fall for obviously manipulative sob stories, but also don’t shame people who find happiness in arrangements that might not look traditional. At the end of the day, if both people are happy and treated with respect, maybe that’s all that matters.
Just remember: a sick Lola in the hospital doesn’t usually text with emojis. And if the typhoon spared the Western Union office, maybe it wasn’t quite the disaster she claimed.
What Should You Do If Your Filipina Girlfriend Keeps Asking You for Money? RUN!
In relationships, trust, mutual respect, and support should be the foundation. Financial requests from your partner should always come from a place of genuine need, not a sense of entitlement. However, if you find yourself in a relationship where your Filipina girlfriend constantly asks for money, it’s time to seriously reassess the situation. In fact, the answer may be simpler than you think: RUN. Period.
It’s hard to come to terms with the fact that someone you care about might be using you for financial gain, but the reality is that money-driven relationships can be toxic and exploitative. There are plenty of reasons why a partner might ask for money, but when it becomes a constant pattern, the relationship could be built on a shaky foundation. The excuses may vary, but the underlying message is clear—your relationship is being commodified, and that’s something you should never tolerate.
The Red Flags: Why You Should Be Concerned
It’s easy to justify the occasional request for help, especially when your partner expresses genuine need. However, the key here is consistency. If your Filipina girlfriend repeatedly asks for money or seems to have an excuse for why she can’t make ends meet, it’s important to take a step back and evaluate the situation.
- She Survived 25+ Years Without You: One of the first things you should think about when asked for money is: how did she survive all these years before you came along? If your girlfriend lived independently or with her family for decades without asking for outside financial help, why is she suddenly in a situation where she “needs” you to send money constantly? It’s essential to keep this perspective in mind because it sheds light on the discrepancy between the life she led before meeting you and the one she’s trying to create with you. People in relationships should lift each other up, not burden each other financially.
- Unrealistic Excuses: Over time, the excuses for money requests can become increasingly elaborate or manipulative. Perhaps she says her family is in dire need of money for medical expenses, or that a friend needs an emergency loan, or that a business opportunity has come up, but she lacks the capital. Some might even say they need money to secure their future with you—creating a sense of urgency and emotional pressure. The key to spotting the manipulations here is realizing that these requests are not isolated incidents; they happen regularly and are presented with urgency and emotional appeal.
- The Guilt Trip: Another common tactic is guilt. She might tell you that she feels hopeless or that she’ll be “left behind” if she doesn’t get the money. This manipulative behavior is designed to make you feel bad and, out of a sense of duty or guilt, send her the funds. In these situations, the emotional toll becomes as significant as the financial one. The emotional manipulation is a clear indicator that the relationship might not be built on genuine care and respect.
- She Doesn’t Contribute to the Relationship: A healthy relationship should be a two-way street. Both partners should contribute, whether it’s emotionally, practically, or financially (when appropriate). If your Filipina girlfriend is only contributing through her requests for money and isn’t investing in the relationship in any other way, it’s a major red flag. Real partners offer support, not just demands.
- The Slow Drip of Requests: Initially, the requests might seem small, maybe for a particular bill or an emergency. But as time goes on, the amounts increase. If these requests become regular, even routine, and you’re starting to feel like you’re being taken advantage of, you’ve crossed into dangerous territory. The slow drip is an insidious method used to wear down your resistance until it feels normal to part with money.
Why Good Girls Don’t Ask for Money
It’s essential to understand that in a healthy relationship, good partners don’t constantly ask for money—especially not without being transparent and having a valid, urgent reason. This doesn’t mean they can’t ask for help in tough times, but constant financial requests are a red flag. Good girls, as they say, don’t ask for money because they value their independence and the integrity of the relationship.
Relationships should be based on trust, mutual respect, and emotional support, not financial dependence. A partner who genuinely cares for you will want to support you, not just financially, but emotionally as well. They should be contributing to the relationship in meaningful ways, showing effort, love, and care, and not just taking from you when things get tough.
What to Do If You Find Yourself in This Situation
If your Filipina girlfriend continuously asks for money, you need to make a choice. There is a fine line between being a generous partner and enabling unhealthy behavior. Here’s how you can address the situation:
- Set Boundaries: You must establish boundaries and make it clear that you won’t tolerate being treated as an ATM. Explain that while you care for her, you cannot support her financially on a constant basis. A healthy relationship is built on understanding, not exploitation.
- Look for Patterns: Assess the relationship for patterns of manipulation or dependency. Are the requests for money coming up more frequently? Does the tone shift from requests to demands? Pay attention to how often this is happening, and ask yourself if this relationship is truly balanced.
- Have an Honest Conversation: Sit down and have a candid discussion about your concerns. Be direct but kind, and make it clear that the constant financial requests are damaging the relationship. This might be uncomfortable, but honesty is the best way forward.
- Evaluate the Relationship: If the behavior persists, it might be time to re-evaluate whether this relationship is truly in your best interest. No one should be in a relationship where they feel used or manipulated. You deserve a partner who is interested in building a life with you—not someone who sees you as a source of income.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, you deserve a relationship that brings you happiness, trust, and support—not one where you feel taken advantage of financially. If your Filipina girlfriend keeps asking you for money, despite the reasons and excuses she presents, RUN. Don’t ignore the warning signs and don’t allow yourself to be manipulated. Good girls don’t ask for money, and if this pattern of behavior continues, you might need to move on and find someone who values you and the relationship, not just your bank account.