Dating in The Philippines

7 Real Signs That a Filipina is Just Using You

You meet a nice girl from the Philippines, probably online, and you find yourself falling for her. You want to think the best of her, but there’s that nagging feeling in the back of your mind that just won’t go away. If you’re reading this article its probably because you want to know if your Filipina girlfriend is for real or just using you.

Money Matters to Most Women

Money is a factor for almost all women when it comes to dating. Women evolved to look for signs of resources (i.e., money) to ensure that a man could take care of her and her offspring. It’s not a bad thing, just as men evolved to look for signs of good health (i.e., youth) to make sure the woman could give him healthy offspring.

It’s not fair to judge any woman too harshly for wanting a man with resources any more than it would be to judge you for wanting a pretty woman. In short, there’s nothing wrong with money being a factor just as long as it’s not the only factor.

7 Signs That a Filipina is Just Using You

These are the most common signs that a Filipina is scamming you.

1 She Tries to Inflate Your Ego

I remember talking to a girl a few years back, and she seemed nice until I noticed she complimented me a little too much. One time she told me, ‘Oh, you’re so humble’ in a nonsarcastic way. When she said that, I thought, ‘Me? Humble? Yeah, right!’. I have no problem admitting that humility is an area of opportunity for me, so someone calling me humble was a clear sign that she was just trying to butter my bread.

Another incident I remember was when I was at a restaurant at the Greenbelt Mall with my girlfriend. In walked a young woman with her confused son in tow with a guy twice her age. They sat behind me, and the whole time, he was just making some of the corniest jokes I’d ever heard, yet she was just laughing so loudly the entire restaurant was gossiping about them.

It was hard to believe the older fellow didn’t realize she was being fake, but it is what it is.

Just like all brown nosers, if she’s trying to inflate your ego, it’s most likely because she wants something from you, and it isn’t your everlasting love.

2 She’s Not Eagar to Meet You in Person/Is Annoyed by a Surprise Visit

Someone in an LDR should be eager to meet their long-lost lover in person. If you guys have been talking a while, she should be asking when you’re coming to visit her. If she’s like most Filipinas, she should be pushing for a visit ASAP. If she seems apathetic about meeting or, worse, makes excuses about why she can’t meet, that’s a good sign she’s just using you.

I always suggest to those in LDRs to do at least one surprise visit and gauge her reaction.   If she’s anything other than elated to see you when you show up unannounced, I’d seriously meditate on her authenticity. Think about it; if the woman you loved suddenly showed up at your doorstep, wouldn’t you be overjoyed to see her?

3  She Asks for Money

Filipinas tend to ask for money in one of two ways. They either constantly complain about their finances, hoping you’ll offer, or they’ll just tell you a sad story and then ask directly.

What I’m about to say may be a bit controversial, but I’ll stand by it until the day I die. Good women, don’t ask for money!  A woman who has her crap together, has life experience, and is genuine won’t ask for money. I realize you may want to be her savior but just remember this. She made it 25 years (or however old she is) without your money. Why is it all of the sudden the sky will fall if you don’t send her $100 now?

Please don’t fall into that trap! If she asks for money or won’t stop complaining about her finances, RUN!

4. Her Stories are Inconsistent

Sometimes they will lie about having a stable job just to reel you in. One week, her lola (grandma) is sick, but the following week it was actually her uncle who was ill.  When you first met her, she told you she grew up in Pangasinan, but three months later, she said she grew up in Pampanga. Make sure you’re listening to her stories and watching for inconsistencies.

5. There’s a Male in Her Life That She Seems to be a Little Too Close With

Back when I was single, whenever I met a girl on a dating site, one of the first things I’d always ask her for is her Facebook. Filipinos love social media and will gladly post almost every aspect of their lives on Facebook.  Want to know what a Filipina is really like? Check her Facebook (make sure it’s her main profile).

There were many things on her Facebook I’d look for, but one of the principal ones was if a particular male seemed to keep popping up over and over on her photos and/or posts. If you confront her directly, she’ll just say it’s her best friend or cousin, don’t believe it. Very few Filipinas have male best friends, and even a close cousin shouldn’t be popping up that much.

If you see a male who seems to pop up repeatedly on her Facebook, chances are high that’s her real boyfriend.

6. Photos of Herself in Expensive Hotels

Let’s be honest, most of the women that will approach you will be from the lower echelons of Philippine society–nothing wrong with that. So if you see pictures of a waitress earning minimum wage at a hotel that costs 30,000 pesos ($616) a night, you’ve got to ask yourself who is paying for that? Also, when you check out her Facebook, look for lots of foreign friends–especially foreign male friends.

I would be wary of any girl that has a lot of foreign male friends and seems to frequent expensive hotels.

7. She Gives Up The Goodies too Quickly

Filipinas are, for the most part, conservative. It’s not normal for a Filipina to post provocative photos of herself on the internet, and it’s certainly not normal for her to take off her shirt on the first or second video chat. A girl who is giving up her body to you quickly has probably done the same for many other guys before you.

Those types of girls are excellent for a casual relationship, but you may want to think twice before putting a ring on that finger.

Bonus Sign: You Met Her at a Bar

Having done original research on this topic, I can tell you that my data show that by far the worst place to meet a Filipina for anything other than casual dating is at a bar. According to my survey of western men married to Filipinas, a whopping 94.12% who met their wives in a bar said they wished they hadn’t married her or were very unsatisfied with their marriages.

Bar girls are trained and practiced in telling you what they think you want to hear. Even if she’s just a patron at the bar, it means she’s probably fast and knows the game.

Be Cautious But Not Paranoid

Love is a risk no matter what side of the globe you’re on. I definitely want you to keep your eyes open and know her well before committing to her but don’t be paranoid about it either. If she’s not exhibiting any of the above signs chances are she’s a good girl just looking for love and a better life.

The overwhelming majority of men I know who are married to Filipinas are very happy with them, and I have real data to prove it. The bitter guys you always hear about complaining they got scammed are a vocal minority and nothing more. Relax.

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